1) Where should I set up the birthing pool?
- I would like it to be in a room where I can close the door and just relax alone or with just Jason and me but still allow other people a common room to sit and visit. Thoughts?
2) What if I freak out?
3) Can I do this without my mom or Jason's mom? (she's not planning to attend so that she can watch the kiddos)
4) How can I explain to people that the kind of help I need when the baby comes is not the kind where they take the other kids away?
- I know that sounds odd, but I just have this fear that folks will want to help out by taking Addie and Freddie for outings, sleepovers, extended stays, etc. and this summer will be my only time with all three of them before Freddie starts kindergarten and I go back to work. Any suggestions or thoughts/experiences in this area?
5) What if Jason and I aren't "telepathic" as Ina May and her hippies say?
- I don't really think that's a good word for it but the question remains. What if he doesn't know what I need, he can't apply pressure in just the right spot on my back, he gets overwhelmed and then angry with me for being a brat? The man can't even tolerate it if he scratches my back and I redirect him to the correct itchy part and I have no idea if it's because he's a punk or if I am. Thoughts again?
I have lots more, but I figure those will be answered by my midwife as things get closer and I have my home visit. What do you say about these though??
3 comments:
First of all, I just laughed out loud when I read #1. Never in a million years would I have guessed that that question would be coming out of your mouth haha. But, since you asked, I would put it.........in your room on top of a tarp. :)
#2. I don't think you're likely to freak out, but if you do it'll be okay. I'm certain the midwife has seen way worse and will know exactly what to do. Jason's for sure seen you freak out and my guess is that he'll just default to whatever exit strategy has worked the best in the past.
#3. Of course you can! While I completely understand the desire to have a mom there you are entirely capable of doing this. And if you need a stand-in I can be on call, although I should warn you that I would most likely have blinders on.
#4. If there is anyone in the world that knows how to put it bluntly, it is you. Stick to your guns and tell 'em like it is! Momma needs her babies.
P.S. I'll cook, clean, and do laundry but I draw the line at bathrooms :)
#5. Hmmmmmmmm
1. I say put the pool in the room with the most room for everything that needs to be done. If your bedroom is the one, then go for it. I like the idea that you want to be able to close the door. I bet that will be nice for you to relax.
2. After hearing about your birthing experience with Addie, I have no worries for this one. I'm pretty sure you can handle anything. BUT if you freak out, it will be short lived and no one will even care.
3. As much as I'm sure you'd like them there, I have faith that you can do it without them. I'm sure you could have them on the phone if you needed encouragement.
4. I'd have to agree with Kristina, just tell them what you want.
5. No thoughts here...my opinion of childbirth (from what I've seen on TV) is that it can bring out the worst and the best in a couple. Just go with the flow? Maybe you guys can talk about it seriously before hand??
You will be fine - I can promise that. This is the most important thing to you and I think that will have an effect on your mood during Charlie's birth.
Looks like you have recieved some good advice already but here is my 2cents:
1. I thought you were going to set it up int he front yard so that you can share this experience with all of your neighbors...
no really, your bedroom sounds like a good place.
2. You are allowed to freak out, however, you have always stayed pretty calm under pressure and I have confidence that you will be just fine.
3. We can arrange for you mom to be there the same way she was for Addie, only it won't have to be kept a secret!
4. Be honest with them, if someone offers to help, just give them a specific job they can do. Like "pick us up some dinner" "put that load of clothes in the wash" most people would probably just ask what you need, if they do offer to take the kiddos I know you have a very sweet way of answering, "thanks for your offer but I am really enjoying being around them right now I will let you know if I need a break in the future".
5. Even though the circumstances were different for Addie's birth, I was able to witness you and Jason working as a team and he never once looked angry to me! ;)
You are going to do great! Can't wait to meet little miss Charlie!
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