Cowboys and Cowgirls!

Freddie's party was a big hit, and here are some pics to prove it!

Addie didn't want to sit next to us, she's already embarrassed to be part of the family! ;)

Those are shoestring potatoes around the cake to hide the fact that the cake maker misinterpreted my instructions to leave the "bottom" of the cake empty for decoration. Instead she left the edges with no border, but this makeshift "hay" was a huge hit with the kids!

Cowboy Freddie!

My beautiful girl!

They refused to look at the camera, but at least they weren't throwing a fit because we were leaving. Don't you know they are sleeping so well tucked into their beds tonight?

Thank you to everyone who made it and for those of you who couldn't, you were greatly missed! Love y'all!

Yup, Freddie graduated Pre-K! They had the sweetest program at his school. All the classes sang and Addie joined in. Here she is with one of her friends. She loves this little girl and gave her a big hug on stage. If only she was as sweet to her brother! She screamed and cried at the beginning but once she saw her other friends up there singing songs she knew, Addie had to go join in and then screamed and cried when it was time to leave.

P.S. I whipped up that skirt the afternoon before, it has squeers on it. That is squirrels for those of you unversed in Addie speak! ;)

The Man of the Hour

Pictures were hard to get in the dark with lots of other parents trying for their own. It didn't matter though, I was crying nearly the whole time. I had no idea they were going to have the little gowns and all. Can anyone else see him at 17? Jason leaned over and said to me, "We're going to blink and we'll be at his high school graduation." More tears! He did such a good job and remembered his line in their program. I just love this little kid so much and it's hard to believe he will be 5 in just a few weeks. Oh gracious they even had them move their little tassels across their hats after they got the diplomas. It was too much. Freddie is excited to start kindergarten and I am trying to deal with it in a non-dramatic way. I will be an emotional wreck come August, leaving our new Charlie girl at daycare for the first time, sending my sweet boy off to kindergarten, and soothing my darling girl Addie as she ventures off to daycare without her best friend, protector, and comfort, her bubba. I'm already crying, for real, no joke, free flowing tears.

I am proud of him, I miss him already, and all the while I can't wait to see who he'll become.

We had our 36 week ultrasound yesterday and the results are in. Charlie weighs anywhere between 5.5-7.5lbs. :) That tells me about as much as those weekly BabyCenter emails! The doc predicts that she's right in between at 6.5 lbs and isn't worried about her size at full term. Technically she will be full term next Wednesday at my 37 week mark. On average, babies gain 1/2 lb a week during this time so even if I go to 40 weeks at his guess she'd be 8.5lbs at delivery. That's a lot bigger than Addie, but still not huge or anything.

We had to go for this final ultrasound and consult with an OBGYN in order to finalize and approve our home birth because of my gestational diabetes. I've been managing it well though and I have full approval. I could now go into labor anytime and safely deliver at home. I have no clue if I'm effaced or dilated and probably won't until I actually go into labor. That's another blessing of midwifery care. Do you know that I've had 1 vaginal exam since being pregnant this time? ONE! That was my initial papsmear at the health department and nobody has gone poking around in there since. It's fantastic and even during these last weeks the midwives don't make that a routine thing and usually only begin checking you during labor and very minimally. I think that's awesome!

Anyhow, we got to see our sweet Charlie on the screen again and she is just pretty awesome. Her legs already look chunky, we could see a little patch of what the tech told us was hair, and we could even see her eyelashes at one point. Her little face was all squished against her placenta pillow though. She's head down and in a fine position to get ready to come out and greet the world. The kids are getting excited and we play a daily game of "Can you play soccer with a baby?" "NOOOOO!!!" they yell. "Can you snuggle a baby with a grown-up's help?" "YESSSS," scream Freddie and Addie. The list of nos and yesses just goes on and on and gets more and more ludicrous. My favorite is when Addie makes up her own. "We can kick da baby?" This precedes very worried glances between Jason and me, then she laughs hysterically and frantically shakes her head and yells, "Naaaooooo!" Oh Charlie, I hope you are the baby of steel!

The camera is here! I only got to play for a minute tonight, but I was glad for that.

The view from above!!
Addie shows on her new fwimmy sooooot.
My son is handsome and silly.
Mommy has serious belly!

I had two comments on my last post and now they are gone...strange! Tomorrow is the big home visit with the midwives. I'm probably making much more out of this than it is, but it is a major milestone for me. It seemed like it would take forever to get here and now it's happening. I met with some interesting folks today that shared their opinions with me about home birth. I have to laugh and respect their comments because I was once a nay sayer about the whole thing!! One lady shared with me how she just couldn't do it because she doesn't like pain. It made me laugh to think of the opposite rationale there. I must enjoy pain, huh? :)

Andrea shared with me one of my emails of horror when my dear friend, Lydia, was planning her homebirth several years ago. I was so amazed by that decision. Anyway, I thought I'd give some more details for anyone out there that may be following this blog for the steps/processes of using a midwife and planning a homebirth. At 36 weeks there is a home visit where the two midwives and the apprentice come to your home for a visit to learn where you live, get a lay of the land, and talk to you more about the birth process. I have lots of questions...I think. I mainly want to know about the water birth situation and how we do the pool, how do you fill it with warm water, where should I put the thing, what if I get tired of the pool? Then I head off to my final ultrasound on Thursday! So excited and hopeful for a good prediction on the size.

Yesterday our home birth supply kit came in! It's in this big box and it's filled with mysterious and amazing things. There are 25 puppy pads, iodine, those amazing pads that get all icy cold when you break them, perineal massage ointment of some sort, an herbal bath pack or two, a fish net (for the water birth...apparently in case any "grotto" as the midwives call it starts floating around in there, gross!), gauze, a nasal aspirator, mesh briefs (I loved those things at the hospital so I ordered some for myself), a cord clamp, gee I don't even remember what all came in the kit but it is awesome. Jason also went to the health department to pick up our newborn kit. It has the vitamin K, eye ointment, two pieces of gauze for some reason, the supplies for the little heel prick, and some other newborn goodies. Having these things sitting in my house is kind of a reality check for me.

"Um, self...do you realize that there's a box of birth supplies on the kitchen table?"
"Yes."
"Well, there are also 6 bottles of hydrogen peroxide, a big plastic bowl for you to puke in, lawn bags, and a gallon freezer bag for your placenta."
"Yes, and..."
"That's weird!!"

I can't believe it, Mother's Days have been very special events for the last few years. The first Mother's Day of my "motherhood" was the day I found out I was pregnant with Adeline. It was an amazing gift. I had woken up knowing it was my day to test since we were actively trying and on our first round of Clomid. I forgot that test morning happened to fall on Mother's Day. After years of negative tests, I dreaded peeing on that stick on Mother's Day of all days. It was stinkin' positive though and things just kept getting crazier from there! We spent that day celebrating with family and Brittany and Freddie were with us then so we both got a Mother's Day lunch at Mimi's!

The next Mother's Day Addie was about 4 months old and Freddie was our foster child. We waited in a huge long line at Loca Luna for brunch with Nana, Pappa Bob, and Robert because they weren't taking reservations. However, a huge group of folks were giving their names at the front and getting seated quickly. I guess that was on the "who do you know" list! Jason bought me a diaper bag I had been eying and an adorable dress I'd wanted for Addie and something else...I can't remember at the moment. It was a huge surprise though and it was just all very thoughtful.

The next Mother's Day Freddie was officially our son!! I was a real live mother of two and Jason worked so hard to make it an absolutely perfect day. We had lunch at Caper's with reservations and excellent service and the kids were angels. I can't even remember what my gifts were but it felt extravagant...I need to ask Jason to remind me. Then we took Freddie to his first ever movie, "How to Train your Dragon," which he found terrifying and spent a large majority of the movie hiding under the chairs! It was a lot of fun though and the day was just super sweet.

This Mother's Day I am 34 1/2 weeks pregnant and have my two sweet children to remind me daily of both the blessings and hardships of motherhood. We had lunch at Caper's again and our sweet Rachel joined us then I got a glorious nap and a date night to Barnes & Noble and Copeland's for a late dinner. Jason got me two beautiful painted canvas prints of pics of the kids that I love and drumroll please..........A NEW CAMERA! It will be making an appearance soon on the blog since my poor Sony has been near caput for the past year and a half or more! Church was wonderful, my husband was charming and kind, and my kids were absolutely themselves 100%.

So, this Mother's Day, I want to focus on those things that often go overlooked when we thank our mothers. Things that I didn't really remember or realize until I became a mother. Thank you moms for not minding holding chewed up spit out food in your hand when we take bites that are too big or tried a veggie that just wasn't what we'd hoped. Thank you moms for always seeming to be a magic trash can for all the paper, wrappers, empty drinks, tissues, and other goodies that we are "all done" with! Thank you moms for having purses full of toys, snacks, candies, extra panties, and chapsticks just to keep us entertained and prepared. Thank you moms for having what seems like 8 arms to carry said purses, catch the food, wipe the noses, catch us before we fall, carry us when we're throwing fits, hold hands across parking lots, and point to things you need that you can't find the name for. Biggest on my heart right now though is a big thank you to the moms that chose life, moms that chose love and sacrifice, to my sweet sister who chose life for sweet Freddie at the age of 15 and then chose life again when she voluntarily gave up her rights and asked that the court grant us custody. I have never been more proud of her or more in awe of her strength. No matter the sad and painful choices that led us to that point, she was given a chance to make another and she chose love and life for her son. I love you Sissy, and I will always be grateful to you.