NO PREGGO

I had to share the hilarity of my children.  Last night was our Women's Bible Study and Kid's Club at church.  I go in the gym to pick up the kids and one of the little boys runs up to me and says, "Hey, she [pointing at Addie] said you were gonna have a baby."

I laugh and said, "No, I'm not having a baby."
Then our children and family minister steps up and asks, "Do you have anything you would like to share?"
Turns out that Miss Liz asked the kids to share a blessing each before dinner.  When they got to Addie, she said, "My mommy is going to have another baby soon."

Well, everyone's face turned and they all just assumed she'd let the cat out of the bag.  I had lots of inquiring minds but I assured them all that I am not pregnant.  This elicited lots of laughter, some relief, and a few inappropriate comments along the lines of, "Oh good, I was thinking, 'Are y'all crazy?!"  I was quick to clarify that we do want a fourth baby someday but that we are not currently pregnant.

On the way home I asked Addie why she told everyone that I was having a baby.  She replied, "Because I want you to."

Here's how the rest of the conversation went:

Me: Well, baby girl, I know we would like to have another baby in our family, but Mommy is not pregnant right now.  I'm not growing a baby in my tummy so we don't need to tell people that because it might make them sad. 

Addie: But I want you to!

Me: I know, but I'm not having another baby right now.

Addie: Why not?  I told them you were having one soon, not right now.

Me: I'm just not, it takes a long time for babies to grow, so I'm not having a baby soon either.

Addie: [Bursts into sad sad tears and sobbing] I waaant you to right now!!!!!

Freddie: Mama, why don't you just go home and get married right now so you can have a baby.  I want you to have a baby tomorrow.  I want a Pokemon baby.

Me: It doesn't work that way Freddie.  Only God can decide when I am able to have another baby.

Freddie: Why don't you ask Him for one?

Me: I have and I will keep praying for that.

Addie: Just roll your window down and ask Him right now!

Me: [laughing a lot] I can pray without rolling my window down, ya goof.

Addie: I want a girl baby.

Me: God gets to decide if we have a girl or a boy, not us.  We will be grateful no matter what we have.

Freddie: Or we'll be grateful if we have two babies.

Me: [doubtfully] Um, yes, we'll be double grateful.

Freddie: Oh, Mama, you can get double pregnant.  Tomorrow you need to kiss two boys.

Me: [laughing more, near peeing my pants]  It doesn't work that way Freddie, stop worrying about it.  Mama will tell you both if we are going to have another baby.

Freddie: You can kiss Daddy and Rimshot, he's a boy.

Me: [thinking he may need a better anatomy lesson than I was willing to give a 7 year old]  No, humans can't have dog babies.  It doesn't work like that.  I'll explain more when you are older.

Addie: We never had a boy baby.

Me: What did you all have for dinner at Kid's Club??????