Yup, ridiculous!

I would like to thank folks for their kind words of encouragement. I have gotten over the initial shock of my visitor and her friends Tammy and Patty. :) A co-worker introduced these names to me and it was too funny not to share. I do feel that Addie and I have done a great job despite difficulties and separation while I'm at work. There are so many ways to do this whole mom thing "right", and I love and respect my sweet friends for every stage of life they are in and how we manage the tasks we've been given with grace, strength, and caution! So, I thought about all the worries I had about feeding that turned out to be no big deal.

Pacifiers
Bottles
Nipple Confusion
Reverse Cycle Feeding
Night Nursing
Supplementing with Formula
Sibling Resentment/Jealousy
Starting solids

There are more, but honestly, all of these things caused me anxiety and our family sailed through them. I know this is a blessing, because there wouldn't be all this literature out there warning about problems and disasters if they never happened.

Addie Belle has only recently started liking a bottle a little more than me, just because there's more in there, she can do it herself, and she can play with it and bite it with no adverse reaction from Mommy. Her pacifier never interfered with her suck reflex or caused nipple confusion. She never cared what type of bottle she had and didn't refuse breast or bottle. She eased her way into daycare at first without drinking much of her bottles and then did this reverse cycle thing and nursed like crazy at home, but within a month or so she was fine and I didn't mind the extra time to nurse and see her. I co-slept with her for her first three-four months (well, it took me about a month to discover this awesomeness) so that she could nurse on demand at night and I could get some sleep. I worried she would never get to the crib and I'd have a horrible time. It took about a week to get her transitioned into her own room and the worst part was that I missed her! Her trouble with sleeping came later and had nothing to do with night nursing!

She's hardly had trouble with constipation from formula, the doctor approved of supplementing so she gets flouride from the tap water (which I think is baloney or bolagna), and she likes it just fine. Addie loves food and it rarely ever interferes with her appetite for milk. She is not one of those babies that stops eating when she's full, she's eaten until she throws up before...specifically at daycare, but the whole common sense there can be lacking at times. :) Finally, Freddy LOVES her so much and he loves to help me with her, and Freddy accepts breastfeeding as her meal time. He likes to ask questions about it and despite my better judgment, I have used the word "boobies" way too many times....and it sounds really funny when Freddy says it. For awhile he went around just saying it in this weird growl, but luckily it sounded kindly like "babies."

All of this is to say that I have counted my breastfeeding blessings, thanked My Lord and Savior for such an amazing opportunity and a perfect design for moms and babies, and told Addie to just keep on truckin' with me. I am not giving up on breastfeeding yet. My good friend, Amanda, and I talked and she encouraged, and I really do feel that I have made a commitment to breastfeeding. My commitment won't falter under these strenuous times. My goal is a year, but my smaller goal is Thanksgiving.

Anecdote: During Addie's refusal to nurse and frustration last night (on the first attempt at going to bed) she would just bury her face in my stomach and give me raspberries. She would laugh afterwards then dive in again. I had to giggle at her and then I took her to Jason and made him let her to it to him. She clapped! She finally agreed to nurse about 30 minutes later and got some zzzzzzs.

Today I feel awful. I don't know if anybody else has had this problem, but I feel like I have failed somehow at this whole breastfeeding thing. I have moved to only pumping once a day at work, due to part resentment towards the evil pump that is not my baby and part inconvenience and business at work. I've had a co-worker or two complain about it not being fair that pumping is allowed while others don't get "breaks," and I guess it has taken its toll. Addie is sleeping through the night and she gets 3 solid meals a day. I only get to nurse in the morning and twice in the evenings and then weekends. She is having mainly formula with only about 4 oz a day of breastmilk. I have to give her a bottle after nursing sometimes because she's upset, frustrated, and obviously not full. I know that she's nine months old, and that I've made it a long way. My hope was to continue until at least a year if not after, and it just isn't working. I feel like giving up. Addie's doctor isn't very supportive, many family members think it's weird, co-workers ask me how long I'll keep nursing her, and I have gotten some strange looks when I tell people that she's started to try and stand up and nurse bent over! :) I never thought it would be harder now than it was at the beginning.

So, the fail part comes in because I had a visitor last night, she has bright red hair and she is terribly obnoxious. I don't know how long people normally go during breastfeeding without this visitor, but I feel like I have failed somehow and it is physically manifested in this terrible event. If I pumped more at work, if I pumped in between feedings at night and on weekends, if I'd waited longer to introduce solids, if if if if if. Did I also mention that Addie only weighs 16lbs 14 oz at 9 months? The doctor isn't "worried" but gave me a recipe to up the calories in her formula and lots of food suggestions to add calories/fat to her diet. Ho hum, that's me today, hmph, yuck, poo. Aren't you glad you stopped by???

Andrea's baby boy, Sean Daniel Kennedy, was born on Sunday 10/18 at 5:23 a.m. I was waiting for the scheduled c-section on Wednesday, but no such luck. He was ready to come out. I sadly didn't get to be there for the birth, but I made it to Memphis by around 11 to see his sweet little self. C-section babies are so cute and perfect. He didn't look like anybody beat him up and squished his head! I don't have any pictures, my camera was dead and I was rushing out the door. There are a several in her gallery and you can read all about it on her blog. He's precious and I can't wait to see him again. So tiny, 7lbs 4.6oz and 19 1/2 inches long, how was Addie ever that small??

It's been a pumpkin crazy weekend for the Allens. We went to Memphis to visit Andrea before Baby K finally arrives. I don't know why I say "finally," when it seems like she's been pregnant no time at all. It goes by so much more quickly when I've been watching Addie grow like a weed for the last nine months. She's nine months today! I'm going to just post a bunch of pictures now!

MMM, I like Hay!

There they are, Andrea and Baby K mystery name...in her belly, not the pumpkin! :)

Freddy and Mommy at the Schnuk's Pumpkin Tent. Do you love his warty pumpkin? Can you even see it on here?

How many bails of hay am I going to have to sit on before this is all over???

I want THIS pumpkin!!!

She still likes hay, we couldn't keep it out of her mouth. Addie really took the "hay ride" seriously.

When Freddy's about 14, I'm going to show him this and I'm certain we'll see similarities. "Gaaahh, my parents are so lame, making me go on a hay ride with my baby sister, uggggh!"

Sweeter, sweets!

He said, "Go, horsey!"

This was Freddy's dream day, cows, bigs, chickens, ducks, horses, oh my golley gee!

It's been raining for several hours and hasn't let up at all. The campus at work is almost flooded, including a bridge that goes across our "crick." I don't want any disasters or anything, but the rain is kind of awesome. It changes a normal ol' Friday into a day everyone has something to talk about. There's also thunder and a flash of lightning here and there. It was picture day at the kids' daycare, so that was fun getting them inside without ruining a hair do or anything. The only mistake today was that it was muggy this morning so I opted not to wear my new plaid jacket I picked up at Goodwill. I was sweating when I put it on. It's plaid day at work, and instead I decided to wear my plaid shoes. They are canvas....what was I thinking? Now I'm wet and cold and looking out my window wishing for my lovely plaid jacket to keep me cozy and socks!!! Oh well, some coffee or maybe hot cocoa will help. Happy Friday!

So, this seems perfectly ethical to me, let me know if I'm wrong. On http://www.shortcuts.com/ you can load coupons to your Kroger card. Several retailers participate, but the only one in my area is Kroger. I've noticed a pattern that these coupons line up with several other sites like http://www.coupons.com/ (which requires stupid coupon printer). It also lines up with http://www.smartsource.com/ which you may recognize from your newspaper inserts. In the past several months I have noticed, by accident at first and then to test it, that if you have a coupon loaded to your Kroger card and you have a paper coupon....yes you guessed it, you can stack them! Unfortunately, most of the lower value coupons on smartsource aren't eligible for doubling and as far as I can tell the ones loaded on your Kroger card do not double either. I need to test this again. So, basically, you are making up for lost doubling. Anything over .60 I think doesn't double at Kroger anyway, so if you find two for over that price then you are really saving some money.

There are several opportunities to use these right now, check it out.

BTW: I made my own laundry detergent last night. It is very exciting! It has to sit in an airtight container for 24 hours, but I cheated and took a peek at it this morning. It's weird. All the soap has coagulated on the top and formed a solid surface and the water is trapped underneath. I'm excited to get home tonight and stir it all up to see what I've got. I'll take a video. I used Zote soap in an attempt to replicate this wonderful smell I've noticed. It sounds horrible, but I've noticed a lot of Hispanic families and children smell so good, like clean linen and fresh soap. I googled this [insert shocked faces here] and discovered I'm not the only one who's noticed and found a few laundry detergent names. The Ariel I bought at a local Hispanic market did not work for the smell, but it was cheap and cleaned our clothes great. So, I also bought a bar of Zote which is specifically a laundry soap with a high fatty acid content. We'll see how it all works out, but I gave myself a headache from cooking up soap, baking Baking Soda to turn it into sodium carbonate instead of sodium bicarbonate, and mixing it all up in a five gallon bucket with some Borax. I felt like a chemist! I used this tutorial.